Zune
From Applepedia
It's like a brown iPod, but for whiners. Supposedly it has an 'indie' styled culture that Microsoft built around it, but really all that means is that the world's largest software company (that pays an MP3 player tax to the world's largest record company/member of the RIAA) makes TV ads that don't make any sense. This, combined with an incentives program, makes the player a good choice for fat bozos who'll never be more than 50 feet from their disheveled collection "managed" by foobar2000 [1].
Every once in a while you buy a black, white or brown one and get a shockingly gay hot pink one. Microsoft somehow considers this a bonus of some sort. I guess if you're enough of a retard to buy a Zune in the first place, you might as well walk around with the equivalent of a giant blinking neon "FAGGOT" sign, except the sign will get you in with interested men and the Zune basically means you'll never have a chance except with inanimate objects like mailboxes and washing machines.
In summary, the Zune is basically a big turd-colored iPod that only people with such bad self-esteem that they need an MP3 player to define their coolness would ever buy.
